The Interview over Lunch: What to Do?

This morning I was reading the job section of the newspaper, and this study caught my eye: The Imbibing Idiot Bias:  Consuming Alcohol Can be Hazardous to Your (Perceived) Intelligence.  This study conducted by researchers at the University of Michigan and University of Pennsylvania looked at how people's perceptions of another changed when the person ordered an alcoholic drink during their meeting.  The researchers found that when a person ordered or drank an alcoholic beverage, the other person thought they had lower intelligence.  As they stated,  "We find that the bias may be costly in professional settings. Job candidates who ordered wine during an interview held over dinner were viewed as less intelligent and less hireable than candidates who ordered soda. However, prospective candidates believe that ordering wine rather than soda will help them appear more intelligent."  Hmm, sounds like something I should explore!

Often, I conduct interviews over lunch or dinner at a nice restaurant.  Being in the wine business, these lunches regularly occur in wine country and at places with very nice wine lists.  It is natural to order a drink, right?  No, it is never a given that any alcohol will be consumed during these meetings--but the very notion of having a drink is full of speculation--on my part yes, but I am sure on my guest's part too.

Case History One:  Several months ago I was asked by a friend to do a mock interview of their son who wanted to make his way in the wine business world.  Having almost finished his degree in business and with prior work experience in wine sales and restaurants, it was interesting to me to find out how he would do in this mock interview.  He handled himself very professionally in the contrived setting, and came across well in the interview.  After the interview I debriefed him on how he did and also gave him my take on possible options for him in the wine industry.  Since he and I had met at a restaurant and only consumed water during the interview, I wanted to make sure the restaurant made a little money off of my table that afternoon, so I encouraged him to order something to eat and drink.  I ordered a light appetizer, and a glass of wine.  Did he?  No.  Smart man.

When I put together my notes from this meeting for his parents, I mentioned his abstaining from drinking during our meeting, and gave him big kudos for that.  I think drinking alcohol can be fraught with meaning in a business setting, and for a young graduate, something to stay away from at all costs.  Oh, I know I'm a wine industry recruiter, but an interview is an interview, and the same rules apply.

Case Histories Two and Three:  On the flip side of this, this weekend I had several meetings with both job seekers and clients who were discussing projects.  At one of the interviews I ordered a beer but my interviewee did not--although we were dining at a brewery.  I thought this showed a lot of restraint on her part, and of course caused me to start to worry about how I was being perceived!  At one of my project meetings my client brought along one of their wines to try--so of course I had a glass of this wine.  But I did not have a second glass, nor did he.   

What to Do:  When meeting with a prospective employer, keep your demeanor completely professional.  Now, we do want to find out a little about you when we meet, so don't worry about talking a bit about your personal life.  And when meeting at a restaurant for an interview, try to brush up on your basic etiquette so you don't embarrass yourself by drinking out of the ice bucket.  And try to match your dining companion's pace and conversation style.

Pace Yourself: Yes, pace yourself my friend!  This can be the hardest thing to do at a business lunch--but I'm not talking about pacing your drinking.  Try to see what kind of meal this is going to be.  When you first arrive you'll get the menu and maybe hear about the dining specials.  I think this is a great opportunity to gauge how much food the other person may be eating.  If they mention that the salad at this place is a meal in itself, they may be planning to just have a salad for lunch--so stay away from ordering an appetizer, a salad, a soup, an entree and a dessert.  You'll have plate after plate coming at you, and your guest and others waiting for you to eat.  The meeting is a time to show off you talents for the job, not how much you can eat.  I also try to let my companion order first, so I can see if they will be having a few courses or sticking with only an entree.  If they order a first course, I try to too.  I don't want them to be desperately trying to finish their soup before the next course comes, while carrying on a conversation about what we are really there to explore.  So, try to keep your order in sync with theirs.


Order Wisely:  Ok, now that you've thought about the amount of food you should order, try to take into account how the food you want to eat will interfere with your meeting.  A few weeks ago I ordered a wonderful summer stew at a meeting, and was very worried when it had shell-on crustaceans and whole cobs of corn to wrestle with.  It was even better when my corn cob sailed through the air after I was trying to get the kernels off using a knife and fork.  While I don't like to get too picky with what I am ordering, it may have been better to make sure this seafood stew would be meeting friendly.  Years ago I worked at a company that forbid us employees from ordering anything that required eating it with our hands.  I have followed this policy loosely in all my ordering--staying away from big juicy burgers and shying away from french fries.  But I do slip occasionally and order something that requires manual manipulation.

And Now the Big Decision:  "And what would you like to drink today?" the waiter asks you eagerly.  If your answer is "hair of the dog that bit me" or "double scotch on the rocks" you may find that your meeting quickly devolves from a meeting highlighting your stellar qualifications into something much less spectacular.  If they say they would like to try one of the beers on tap, or ask the waiter what wine would be good with their fish--be hesitant in ordering a drink too.  You can't go wrong with water--sparkling or still.  Another safe option often is iced tea.  And good old lemonade can keep you focused and hydrated. Isn't that why you would want something to drink anyways?

Why You are There:  Alright, so now that you got all the ordering taken care of, keep your focus on the meeting--not the food.  You want to enjoy your meal--but if you have something that is so-so--keep your opinion to yourself and carry on with the conversation.  If there is truly something wrong with your meal, decide what you need to do--if you must send it back--do it, nicely.  But if it was a little underwhelming, eat a little and be happy you won't get caught with your mouth full of food very often.  You want to be talking a lot, so don't worry if you don't eat much.  Just have your plates cleared when your companion's are, and be thrilled to get the time to highlight your qualifications.  

Coffee Anyone?:  And if the meeting is going well and your host wants a cup of coffee, by all means have one too.  This time can sometimes be a nice chance to talk without plates of food between you, and often is a time to see what the next steps are in the interview process and learn how you are being perceived by the--hopefully future--employer. 

Eating and Interviewing

As a recruiter, I often meet candidates at coffee shops, restaurants and bars. Having done this for years, it comes as second nature for me to eat, talk and interview. But recently I was recruiting for a scientific position, and realized that interviewing and dining is a learned skill.

With home offices and telecommuting becoming the norm, more people are getting together over food to conduct business. Thinking back, when I first did this it seemed very awkward. How can you look intelligent while you have a mouth full of food. What if spinach gets caught between your teeth. And what if, horror of horrors, you spill your pasta all over your lap. Well here are some tips to make it a little less intimidating

• Be on time: This goes without saying for any interview. By being on time you can meet your host in the lobby of the restaurant, allowing you both to be seated at the same time. If you are early, you may even be able to scan the menu and know what you are having, giving you more time to interact with your interviewer.
  
• Let people know you are there: If you arrive before your host, let the staff know you are waiting for someone, and give them your name. This way when the other person gets there they may be introduced to you by the restaurant staff.
• Follow the other person's lead: Once you meet your contact, defer to them about where they would like to sit, and what type of food they are having. When the waiter asks what you would like to have, you can always let your host go first. This gives you some time to plan your meal, and make sure you are ordering a similar or smaller size meal. You don't want to order a five course dinner if your interviewer was just having an appetizer.
• Hold off on the liquor: Yes, we are wine industry professionals, but many companies frown on their staff drinking during business meetings. While your interviewer may order a drink, it is safest to stick with a nonalcoholic one. Evening meals are a bit different, as are meetings in bars. Err on the side of caution, but if the interviewer orders a bottle of wine and offers you a glass, it may make more sense to have a drink. Just watch yourself and don't overdo.
  
• Think logistically: In recruiting we are always meeting people for lunch and dinner interviews. A former competitor of mine would require their staff to only order food they could eat with utensils--no burgers, no sandwiches, etc. This is a good idea, but can limit your food choices at a diner. And even though clam linguini requires a fork and knife, dealing with those clam shells can be quite a feat. Think about what's involved with the food you are ordering, and go on the safe side. This isn't your chance to try oysters on the half shell, it is an opportunity to spend time with a potential employer.
• Don't be a glutton: Think back to any and all manner instruction you have had in your life. Listen to what your mother said and don't slurp your soup. If you realize you haven't heard a thing the interviewer has said, maybe it's because you are so focused on the food that you aren't paying attention. Again, this isn't about the food, it is about the meeting. Do eat the meal in front of you, just pace yourself and stay professional.
• Eat: I know I say that the interview is more important, but this meeting may be held during a mealtime because it was the only time your host could carve out time to eat and meet with you. No one likes to eat alone, and if you are not even touching your food, it could be awkward. Take the plunge and eat.
• Don't talk with your mouth full: Again, listen to your mother. If the interviewer asks you a question just as you have taken a bite of food, they will understand if you need to take a minute to respond. Planning can limit this. Take a bite of food after you have completed a comment, and eat while the other person is describing the job or outlining the company's policies.
• Don't clean your plate: While your mother may have forced you to clean your plate growing up, don't worry about it here. If you have been eating throughout the interview, it won't seem odd if you don't eat everything. I also recommend not taking your leftovers home. While you may always do that when you dine out, this is a business meeting. It is somewhat awkward to have to get your food boxed up, and can be even more unweildy to have a to-go box in your hand while you are trying to shake the person's hand at the end.
• Who pays: While I would recommend bringing along enough money to pay your way, if you were invited to the meal by your host, it is customary for that person to pay. Do not worry about this. As I tell my interviewees, the restaurant is my other office, and I am happy to pay.
  
• Thank your host: At this point hopefully your interviewer has picked up the check. Once they have paid, thank them. It is always polite to do this, and is something that the person will expect. The worst thing would be to forget to thank them.
• Thank your waiter: Be gracious with the wait staff. By showing good manners and being appreciative to them you will show your good manners for future coworkers and colleagues. A thank you when you get your water filled can show that you appreciate everyone who is part of the team. This graciousness will be very important when you work at the company you just interviewed with.

Bon Appetit!